April 11


How to Improve Communication in a Relationship

By NeuroHealth Arlington Heights

April 11, 2023

communication, marriage, relationships

Effective communication is the foundation of healthy and successful relationships, whether it’s in a professional or personal context. When people communicate well, they can build trust, deepen their connections, and collaborate effectively to achieve common goals. Conversely, poor communication can lead to misunderstandings, conflict, and relationship breakdowns. Improving communication skills can be challenging, but it’s a worthwhile investment that can yield significant benefits. In this article, we’ll explore various strategies and techniques that can help improve communication in all types of relationships. As a provider of couples counseling to the Arlington Heights, IL community, NeuroHealth is here to help.

Active Listening

Active listening is a crucial component of effective communication and can be particularly helpful in all types of relationships. Active listening involves focusing your attention on the person speaking, acknowledging their words, and responding in a way that shows you understand their perspective. When you actively listen to someone, you create an environment of trust and respect that can lead to stronger and more fulfilling relationships.

One way to practice active listening is by using open-ended questions that encourage others to share their thoughts and feelings. For example, “How do you feel about that?” or “Can you tell me more about what you’re experiencing?” This not only shows that you’re interested in what the other person has to say but also provides an opportunity for them to fully express themselves.

Another important aspect of active listening is showing empathy. This involves putting yourself in the other person’s shoes and acknowledging their point of view. You can demonstrate empathy by paraphrasing what the other person has said and recognizing their feelings. For example, you might say, “It sounds like you’re feeling frustrated because…” or “I can see why you feel that way.”

Clarifying Communication

Clarifying communication is another important strategy for improving communication in all kinds of relationships. Misunderstandings can often arise when people make assumptions about what others mean or when they don’t fully understand the message that’s being conveyed. By clarifying communication, you can ensure that everyone involved has a clear and accurate understanding of the message being shared.

One way to clarify communication is by paraphrasing what the other person has said. This involves restating their message in your own words to confirm that you’ve understood the conversation correctly. For example, you might say, “So if I’m understanding you correctly, you’re saying that…” This not only helps to ensure that you’ve understood the message accurately but also shows the other person that you’re actively listening and trying to understand their perspective.

Clarifying communication can also involve being mindful of your own communication style. Make sure that your message is clear and concise, and avoid using jargon or technical language that might be difficult for others to understand. Being respectful and avoiding blame, criticism, and judgment can help to create an environment of open and effective communication.

Being Mindful of Body Language

Improving communication in a relationship
Street shooting by Mussi Katz is licensed with CC0 1.0

Being mindful of body language is another strategy that can help improve communication. Nonverbal cues, such as facial expressions, tone of voice, and body language, can convey a lot of information and often have a greater impact than the words being spoken. One way to be mindful of body language is to maintain eye contact with the person you’re speaking to. This can show that you’re engaged and interested in what they’re saying and can help build trust and rapport. Conversely, avoiding eye contact can be perceived as disinterest or a lack of engagement.

In some cases, a sense of disinterest or disengagement can come from an individual with executive dysfunction, as they may have trouble listening or paying attention. Executive function disorder (EFD) refers to a set of cognitive abilities that are essential for planning, organizing, initiating, and completing tasks. These abilities are controlled by the prefrontal cortex of the brain, which is responsible for regulating behavior, attention, and emotions. Individuals with EFD have difficulty with one or more of these tasks.

Another aspect of body language to be mindful of is your posture. Standing or sitting up straight can convey confidence and attentiveness while slouching or leaning back can suggest disinterest or discomfort. It’s also important to be aware of your facial expressions and tone of voice. Smiling and using a warm and friendly tone can help put others at ease and create a more positive and comfortable atmosphere for communication. Conversely, a negative or hostile tone can create tension and lead to misunderstandings.

Using “I” Statements

Using “I” statements is another strategy for improving communication in any type of relationship. These are statements that begin with “I” and express your thoughts, feelings, and perspectives clearly and directly. They can be helpful in avoiding blame, criticism, and defensiveness and can lead to more effective communication and deeper connections.

For example, instead of saying, “You always make me feel like I’m not important,” you might say, “I feel hurt and unimportant when I don’t feel heard.” This not only expresses your own feelings and perspective but also avoids placing blame or criticism on the other person, which can create defensiveness and tension.

Using “I” statements can also be helpful in resolving conflict. When expressing a disagreement or difference of opinion, you might say, “I understand your perspective, but I see things differently,” instead of saying, “You’re wrong.” This approach can help to de-escalate conflicts and create an atmosphere of openness and understanding. It’s also important to be specific when using “I” statements. Expressing yourself clearly and concisely can help to ensure that your message is understood and lead to more effective communication and better outcomes.

Effective communication is a fundamental component of healthy and fulfilling relationships, and there are many strategies that can be used to improve communication in all kinds of relationships. Active listening, clarifying communication, being mindful of body language, and using “I” statements are just a few examples of strategies that can help create an environment of open and effective communication.

By improving communication, we can deepen our connections with others, increase understanding and empathy, and resolve conflicts more effectively. It takes effort and practice to improve communication skills, but the benefits can be significant and long-lasting.

Ultimately, improving communication in all types of relationships requires a willingness to be present, engaged, and open to feedback. By working on our communication skills, we can create more positive and fulfilling relationships and enhance our overall well-being and happiness. Here at NeuroHealth Arlington Heights, Illinois, we provide a range of services for children, young adults, and their families, including help with improving communication skills. To find out more, call our friendly team at 847-321-7631 or complete the secure online form on our contact page.

NeuroHealth Arlington Heights

About the author

For over 20 years, NeuroHealth Arlington Heights has been offering neuropsychological and psychological assessments and treatments for people of all ages. These assessments and treatments address Behavioral, Emotional, & Social Issues, Neurocognitive Functions, and Neurodevelopmental Growth.